Brownbutterfly

I have spent the last one year trying to be still and find my purpose. I have gone for long walks, had coffee with good friends, locked it in, let it out, prayed, read and cried loudly when I am alone.  In the last few months, I started coming to the realization that my purpose is here and now. It is not any one thing or job. It is what I do with today and how I choose to close each day I am blessed with. It is in reviewing each day and building on it the next because a day that we lose is lost forever. So I started learning to ask myself, did I make the best use of the gift of the last 24 hours? have I made a difference to anyone? have I loved my neighbour...But even before that, have I loved myself? After all, the commandment is to love your neighbour as yourself...   It all begins with loving yourself, because it is how you will learn to love others. I am 18 years married and almost 17 years a mum. Somehow, I managed to bury my true self in the process of creating and maint...

Have you ever felt like you knew a soul you've never met? It's that feeling you get when you read something a total stranger wrote and you connect with it like you could have been the one saying or thinking that! I feel like that sometimes when I hear a song or read a book or article written by a familiar soul. The soul that takes your thoughts and puts it into eloquent words. The soul that writes and you connect with what was written. That soul may be in a body you've never met. It may be a different color, race and ethnic origin from you but it is definitely a soul you know. I believe I am lucky because while I have come across familiar souls in music and literature that I have had no physical contact with, I am also experiencing the blessings of friendship with a few familiar souls. She is that friend who patiently waits and holds no malice when your spirit requires space and solitude. The one who focuses on your strength and points out a difference of opinion without ...

Today, I watched with a sense of helplessness and hopelessness the breaking news of the massacre of innocent school children by the Taliban in Peshwar. I sit up and stare into space for a few minutes wondering what has become of the world I grew up in and a religion I was once passionate about and all I feel is sadness. I am saddened beyond words. I can predict and pre empt the reaction of most muslims I know, it will be something like this ( in various forms) "These people are crazy terrorists; It has nothing to do with religion" I have gotten to a point where I'm inclined to think these types of comments are not enough and will not change anything. A weak sweeping comment denying association with terrorist groups who insist on associating with a specific religion is not enough! Particularly if it is a religion where cartoons about the prophet and the burning of the Quran could cause major international riots. The silence and mild dissociations from a steady stream o...

It has been such a long long time since i wrote anything except for things like  proposals and the like. But in the last few weeks, something has been bugging me so much i feel the need to let it all out so here goes! What is it with the African society and this preposterous idea that we must conceive and bear babies soon after we marry? I have heard and experienced countless people go through tremendous pressure to "bear a child" shortly after marriage. Often times, the women give in to the pressure and sometimes take risks and make decisions that they would not have made rationally if they were not so pressured. Our society is a pushy aggressive one and individuals must learn to stand up for themselves even if it means standing alone. I have watched the tragic outcome of a few victims of this pressure. I have seen marriages break down and happy people become suicidal due to conception pressure and it is sad that we consent to this perception by our silence. Fact: The proc...

There's a room in my heart; A room for wandering strangers A room for homeless kids A room for those that need A little bit of love. I keep it safe and warm for those who come and go so when I love my folks and those I always love I leave a little space for the traveller in the dark who needs some gentle care and a little bit of love I keep that little room for the homeless little kids who need a little love but cannot pay for it I keep the little room for the injured birds of spring a place to heal their wounds before they fly back home. the doors are always open and the room is always there for every passing stranger who needs an open heart. First  written by  Arinola Abari in Aug.1996